Homegoods, Hanes Mall Boulevard
Y'all. For 800 bucks plus change, you can change your life. You can alter your destiny. You can acquire a new identity.
You, my friend, can become The Person Who Lives in the Horse House!
You'll need to install it, of course, but think of all the fun you'll have seasonally decorating your ten foot tall, rearing stallion! (Mustang?) Santa hat at Christmas, bunny ears at Easter, maybe a well shaped heart between his hooves in February and a patriotic bunting in July!
I grew up loving destination houses. We kids didn't know street names, but we knew The Pink House. We knew The Swing House. And we knew and were forever astounded by The Mushroom House.
Someone, please embrace this opportunity. I promise to whinny every time I drive past.
Hurry, though. There's only one.